I woud like to write something different about my feeling, but it’s so hard to me if you look at me in this way. I try.
Talk about myself? Maybe really you dont know about me. Maybe you know about me just as the girl who fallen in love with you and you know about me as the girl who everyday thank you for everything you gave me. And that’s real.
However here i’m.
I consider myself a daydreamer and i think that if you believe in something with all your strenght to the end, you get it. And it was which happened among us. I’ve seen ‘something special’ in you, and it was real special.
Since i was born i had physical problems, especially with legs. Maybe you get my closiness to your Long John. Since i was born i had legs operations. So many to be a child of just a few months of life. I have many scars, to be a woman. Maybe that’s why i locked myself up in my bedroom and i dream about you. Loving eachother with no shame.
Yes i had a story, but it finished 3 years ago. They were been 13 long years, but the lastest two years it was like we didnt love eachother anymore. So.
Thou I had my own experiences, but when you look foward and your target is so big. What do you do? You must to think about other thing that you ‘could do’ with any problems. And i have a lot of problems. But surely i didnt ever give up myself. And which i wanted i got it even with a lot of slowness. But what i got from you it’s that to the end you will reach to get what you want. And always with slowness i think i’m reaching to you, And i feel you have something more than other people. I feel it inside of me. And i’m sure you got something among us. Morever i’m sure you’re a sensitive person like me. What feel i hear everytime when you’re ‘close to me’ (online or tweeting), it’s very strong. Maybe you think i’m a foolish girl, maybe not. Who knows.
With what i had in my life, my only way to express myself it was and it is, write. I love to write since i was a child. I express much better my feelings trought a pencil or a keyboard as im doing right now than with my voice. I have also problems with my voice since i was born. What girl! Yes too many problems… such problems!
My love to write is intuitive.
As you know, i also wrote a vampire novel. I did love write it. I spent nights and nights to write it on notebook. It’s a handwriting novel. Three big notebooks. My only regret it’s still ‘there‘, in my desktop drawer. Never thought to send it to a publisher. Maybe one day, or maybe it will remain there close in forever.
But the most important thing for me, right now is i’ve found you. You give me that ‘right’ push to improve myself everyday. Which i learnt from you it’s very important to me.
And for this and for other things i whisper you just that ‘thank’ i say, i think everyday, everynight when we are so close eachother, when we get connected in our parellel world.