For the very first time had met my deepest self, and tiny part of my soul, that i was been capable to hide even to myself.
I didn’t have, not even, sat at my table: i had opened that heavy door, and i was remained there.
All in a stroke, the buzz of the bar has vanished, and the other clients were just silhouettes: they were become ghosts who wandering without a destination.
Their silhouettes were becoming mufflled, and i wanted just be like them: insignificant.
Those two eyes that were looking toward me, were leaving me without the breathe, and they were making don’t understand anything.
You was shyly smiling me, and in that smile, you have made me understand what i don’t really wanted, understand: i was recognizing those eyes, that glance, and what i really wanted to do was escape.
Everything was suspended, just our glances that in those instants were talking each other, and just our souls could decipher what they were saying.
I could not swallow: my throat was drying completely, i had need to drink, even if i would have some difficulties to drink some sips, but my body, but above all my mind, was dehydrating fastly.
Slowly, i held back the breathe, and i made those three steps, to reach the round bench in front of my table, and always slower, i have called Philip.
Philip, had noticed which atmosphere was creating itself, and he came to me tiptoed, already knowing what i have would asked him, and without make me open the mouth, he nodded, and immediately he went away, but immediately after he got back with a iced glass of water. He reccomended himself to me to drink slow, and after he went away looking at toward your part.
Without say nothing, you have looked at him, who got back behind the counter, and without realize Philip sighed: “It seems that Daria has seen something that has daze her”, and for a minute that seemed lasting an eternity, you have shared the glance with him, and, just after, you have said, lost in thought: “We have done the same dream.” Philip who was in front of you, had listened what you had as soon murmured: he had well comprehend it, but as his habit, he pretending to have not listen, and looking at who had in front frowning, and grunting a simple “Uh?”, leaving think the clients, and in this case you, that he hadn’t understand.
Turning himself, pretending to check some missing bottles, he wided the eyes, comprehending always more what you had said.
Just in those instants he reminded the words of that homeless who occasionally got in, and asking just a glass of milk and some biscuits. He held back the breathe, and turning himself again toward the counter, he threw away the air from the lungs, looking for to be more normal he could.
They seemed little pieces of a big puzzle that they had to be stuck in an precise order, and this, maybe, was the very first piece in which our beings were meet, in the highest way possible: living the same experience, in different places, and the bar was the meeting point of everything.
Now, Philip was looking at us, studying each smallest shades of our glances.
At my table, i was recovering myself drinking that glass of water, looking for get calm me, but it was impossible: now that i had realized everything, i could just to stare that part of the counter… that green stool, your back, and with a game of reflection trough the glass of beer you had in front, you could see me, without any embaressement, but there was, and it was tangible.
In those instants, i have would wanted just got back in that place with you, and staring at you for hours, even in silence.
I have glimpsed your glance trough the glass, and your gaze was filling me of something incredible.
If i wasn’t got up, and i would not left the bar, i would be exploded.
I took a last look inside that glass, and with a slow nod, i saluted Philip, and i left the bar trough the heavy door next to the jukebox.
Philip, immediately after looked at you.
Slowly, you has looked the door closing.”
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