“I was still staring” – [39]

The Runes in front of me and slowly i was taking again breathe and i had your glance that was in my head and i was in total confusion.
What they wanted to say me? I didn’t understand, or more simply i HADN’T WANTED UNDERSTAND. I was understanding much well, but: “Did i wanted really understand?”
My head was exploding and my heart wanted come out.
There was something in what has happened that evening that still dazed me. Maybe it was that dream: the same feelings we had felt, your glance… or maybe that soft touch: it got me in confusion and now my beloved runes were saying me something that it was hammering my head. Something of important.
The light of the moon was entering in my white room and it was illuminating the three Runes that i have left on the little cabinet next to the bed.
Now, i just wanted empty my mind and in the next hours look for to don’t think about you.
I have laid me on the mattress a for a long minute a stare the roof and that wet spot that each day got bigger and bigger. I should have warn Phillip.

While i was enveloping me in the bedsheets i have imagined still one more time your arms around me and that bedsheets were that your white shirt and with that image in my mind i fell asleep
Something has happened during that sleep: something of important in both our lives of us.
That involuntary touch, the previous evening, had provocated an approaching of two souls who came from other place, another universe, another time. Two souls who hadn’t, never give up to look for eachother.
In our sleep, in our dreams, our hands touched again and again and besides that chocking sensation in our bodies and above all, in our minds it was developing a new strange feeling: a new opening.
You in your apartment and me in my little white room, we could feel us inside in a spiral that little by little was growing and got unite us always more.
We could feel our bodies merging one in another and our minds exploding and recompose immediately after.
We could feel our breathe got faster and faster and our stomachs were about to throw up everything, even the brain. The belly contractions were strong: it seemed we had thrown up also the soul, but just few gastric acid drops has came out from our mouth and it spotted the bedsheets.
We have opened the eyes right after. Our hearts still were beating like crazies, and we still our heads that were spinning. We couldn’t close again because everything was starting to spin like a spinning top.
I got up and i went in the bathroom to throw up…. nothing, just other gastric acid that it was rising up from my stomach and i washed my mouth and i stared me in the mirror. I was pale.
I have opened the window.
You, in the apartment, slowly have opened the eyes again and that spinning sensation was gone away. You remained in bed still for long.”
X

 

Daria

⇐ “Along the sidewalk” – [38]

“You got up” – [40] ⇒

2 thoughts on ““I was still staring” – [39]”

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