My alarm clock were been my thoughts that still were hammering my head and i didn’t know how stop them.
The only thing i could do, was get up and try to think to another thing that it wasn’t you, but at the moment it was really impossible. In my mind there was an one and only image, and that was you that you was sweetly smiling me and also at that only thought, i was blushing.
I went to the little window and i have opened it. I have looked down in the street. In that moment it was empty: no sound neither in background. For a moment it seemed i was living in a dream made only by my thoughts and your sweet gaze that delicately was touching my soul.
I sat on the board of the bed and for a long minute i remained there without do something. I wanted try to empty my mind, but more i was trying to free the mind, more the little voice inside of me, was saying me that it was impossible. By now, those eyes, were the only reason to go on and i didn’t want admit it, but it was so.
I took my diary and i have read few thoughts i had wrote about you and more i was reading them, more i was throwing away the air from the lungs, as if i was short of oxygen.
I got up, but immediately i fallen again on the bed: my head was spinning like a crazy. Maybe i had to eat? It was the first time that happened to me. And i was sure that it wasn’t because i had to eat something.
It came from more profound and something was saying me it was bonded to you. I shaked me and slowly i went in bathroom for wash me.
Those eyes still hammering my mind till i didn’t come out. That strange sensation inside didn’t left me, even if I had to start getting used to it.
In elevator i closed the eyes and i touched my belly sweetly.
I directed myself in the local, where i meeting Phillip and he gently asked me: “How are you… better?” i thanked him for his interesting and i sat at my table.
Without asking, Phillips has brought me the breakfast that i slowly, have started to eat.
I thought that tangle in my stomach, could fade swallowing the first mouthful . On the contrary, it remained. I didn’t notice it anymore and i continued my breakfast.
That day seemed goes by so slowly, but right after, as a blows of wings, the evening has arrived and that vise in the stomach, suddenly, has grow up always more and my heart has begun to beat hard. I looking at me around: i was feeling lost, as if i was falling in a black hole where i would have lost all my senses, when you entered with your friends and slowly you sat on the same stool in front of the counter, where Phillip has asked what you wanted and: “An iced glass of beer” has resounded till at my table, as if i hadn’t noticed that you was just entered. My heart was beating really hard and i didn’t have still lifted my face, while i was biting my lips.
I recognized the voice of the blond long hair guy, but above all i could feel you and your desire to turn your face toward me. That tangle that it was strangling me inside is exploded when you was been able to spin your face and our glances meeting and you has smiled me, shrugging, leaving me uderstand that evening it would going in that way. I smiled you back, throwing away the air from the lungs. That evening i stared at you without shame and i would have like to come next to you for touch your hands. I closed many times the eyes and often when i reopened them you was staring me, as if you was able to read my thoughts. When it was happened, each time my heart wanted escape away: it was a big emotion what i was feeling when everything happening and i was sure it was the same also for you.
You was on that stool and me in my table, but our souls were in the middle and they were sweetly touching, and we could feel it.
At a certain moment you got up and you was looking for something in the pocket of your shirt. Your friends were about to leave the local and they were calling you. “You go” you have said them, while you was awaiting for they were going out.
My heart stopped. I started to stare with wide eye open, my hole in front of me.
I knew you was coming close the jukebox. I was still staring the hole, but i have could feel the perfume of your leather jacket and in that moment i have closed the eyes. When i heardt you have inserted the coin, slowly i lifted my face and i seen your silhouette and for that evening our eyes dived one in another for a long second, when from the entrance your friend has called you again and you had to go.
In that second all our certainty were fade. Now we were looking for us strongly.”